A friend recently forwarded an email to me titled "The Invisible Mother," a short essay comparing the tireless and often thankless job of a mother to the builders of Europe's great cathedrals. Both give their whole lives for a work they will never see finished, both make sacrifices and expect no credit, and both are fueled in their passion by the faith that the eyes of God see every detail. The writer of the essay was inspired by the thought that our endless efforts in motherhood, invisible as they may seem, are worth it and can make an enriching life.
For many of us, the way we choose to hold our invisibility at bay is by creating something tangible. For me, my days often end with knitting - my love of fiber and the need to do something relaxing end up producing something I can hold and look at. Nobody will know how many times I swept under the high chair that day, or how many toys I picked up, or how many times I tried to coax a "please" or "more" or "sorry" out of my 5 year old. But a darling, handmade infant hat? That you can see.
I start new projects every day, and my 10 year old does the same. In this process of creating (and yes, often not finishing our projects!) we connect with each other and a bigger picture of ourselves in the process. My plan for this blog is to share the projects that excite me and bring some accessible proof of my existence in this invisible world of mothering!
So, this blog is dedicated to the mothers out there whose days are filled with the minutia of tasks that build our children and our families. I often tell people that I haven't decided what I want to be when I grow up. But for now, I am the builder of a great cathedral. With every shoelace tied, lunch packed, and forehead kissed, I build.
And I can hardly wait to create something new...
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
A Kid Again
As I fought with the sewing machine and somehow managed to sew a snap on crooked (which isn't that bad, considering the snap I put on Grace's dress was inverted the first time - doh!) it occurred to me that when I'm working on projects outside of my comfort zone I really feel like a kid again and get to the point where I'd prefer just to quickly slap it together at the end and not worry about crooked snaps and uneven seams and ugly knots. Hot glue begins to sound really awesome! Now when I'm knitting, I can practically do it with my eyes closed. I will spend 1/2 an hour picking out a mistake that no one would ever notice but me. Definitely a grown-up then. But today, as I finished my cold pasta meal, I was definitely a kid. And that apron is DONE, dude! Hopefully Rowan will love it, and approve of the bit of lace I put on the bottom (which was not in the original design).
Now we're at the point where I have to deal with her hair. Yarn is usually my friend, as long as it involves knitting needles of some sort, but creating a head of doll hair is definitely beyond my comfort zone. Ooo! Maybe I will just wait on that little project until my Mommy comes to visit this weekend! Perfect. Now I've got the afternoon off!! Ha. If my mom is going to be sleeping in our guest bed I have to deal with the fact that we unloaded the entire box of fabric scraps all over it last week. They belong in a box that is too small, in a corner of the closet which is too tight and hard to get to without upsetting everything around it, which is why I've been putting it off. Oh wait! Brad is working from home today and on conference calls in the guest room all afternoon - I can't put it away now! YES!
Yeah, I'm totally a kid today.